Every Wednesday Madison Woods posts a picture prompt to challenge writers to create a 100-word story or poem or anything that works for you. then post your work on your blog. additionally, on friday, you go back to her site and post a link to your blog entry in the comments on her friday fictioneers post.
I’m going to try to keep up with this, as should you. give it a shot. i prefer to stick to 100 words, but she doesn’t mind either way. not everyone has an hour and a half like i had this morning to sit and write, revise, edit, revise, edit, etc. until getting it down to 100 and telling everything you want to tell.
here’s this week’s picture. if you don’t want to read my entry or be influenced by what i wrote, then don’t scroll beyond the picture. until friday.
.
.
.
“Can’t be. They always move.”
“Jimmy. Again. It’s. Not. Moving.”
They walked circles. It stayed still.
David knelt in grass. “It just goes into the ground.” He found a stick, poked, nothing. He tossed it, not watching. It landed near flattened grass and footsteps, blades curled, blackened.
“Touch it.”
“You touch it.”
“Rock, paper, scissors.”
“Okay.”
“Best of three.”
Jimmy cursed, rolled up sleeves.
David stepped back, unaware, standing in a dark trail leading away.
A clump of trees, not far. One last, lonely heartbeat of a boy. Rusted skin. Charred arm. Missing hand.
Ants feasted.
A scream.
Vultures blinked.
________________________
100 words
Yikes Rich! such a pretty bucolic picture…Vultures blinked.
Good job!
thanks. i was blank for two days. just came together today.
This is … awesome! Love it.. especially the ants & vultures.
Thanks miss
Charred arm, missing hand? Eck, that painted a gruesome picture in my mind. I worked one out, but I’m a little iffy about it. Not a gruesome tale though. http://unduecreativity.wordpress.com/2012/05/17/fields-of-wildflowers/
took me a few days to come up with something. on my way to yours.
Hmmm, having just come back from OZ myself, when I saw this picture I KNEW I was going to be lead Somewhere Over the Rainbow! Thanks for surprising me. Nice!
Well, I was also surprised. I hope you will continue.
that’s the end. only 100 words. that’s the challenge.
Very well done! In the style of Edgar Allan Poe! mine can be found here: http://oldentimes.wordpress.com/2012/05/17/can-it-be-friday-fictioneers-may-18-2012/
thanks very much. something for me to read? thanks again.
Dear Rich,
The dark side of a rainbow? I really enjoyed this story. Great imagery within a tale of a children’s trust betrayed by a nameless force. Does not evil often come into our world disguised as light? Very deeply layered, this one. Cool.
Aloha,
Doug
http://ironwoodwind.wordpress.com/2012/05/18/no-rain-no-rainbows-3/
thank you sir. i appreciate the time you put into examining it.
Boo!! It’s not easy to write short pieces like this.. well done!!
Thanks miss. That means a lot to me.
How you got such a grim image from such a colorful picture–that’s pretty damn impressive!
Thank you very much. That nice picture made this 1 even more difficult to write.
I loved it!
I love that you loved it.
You never disappoint this is great wonder who drug the ladt boy off and if it will get both boys this time.
here’s mine! http://createrealitylivelife.wordpress.com/in-the-eyes-of-tragedy/
hey, i never thought of that. i was thinking the kid crawled away after burning his hand on the rainbow. maybe something created the rainbow and carried him away, so the next kids won’t see the body and then get the next kid too. could be.
from rainbows to screams…I sure heard the scream, and forgot bout the rainbow…
my link: http://writersclubkl.wordpress.com/2012/05/18/friday-fictioneers-head-tripping/
“Dark side of a rainbow”
Apt description. Well done!
thanks miss.
you’re welcome
Rich, I was a little disappointed this time. Which is your own fault because you have set my bar of expectation very high. You usually do a very well-crafted 100 words. I thought that this one was a bit rough. It was very graphic and did its job of storytelling. No doubt about that. It just felt a bit rushed – as if you were chucking out words to get down to the 100, without really rewriting. On the other hand, you wrote something. I didn’t. So, well done for that.
i accept. thanks. it was not written well in terms of crafted sentences. it was kind of choppy with incomplete phrases in order to get down to 100. but then i was actually a bit below and looked what to add to get back up to 100, thus came the vultures and ants. maybe i could have done without them in place of better sentences. no disagreement from me.
I hesitated about saying anything, but I thought that it was better to do so because when, in the (probably) near future, I tell you that I think that you’ve done a great job, you’ll know that it’s true – not just conventional words.
don’t hesitate when it’s what you really feel because sometimes i feel similar things, but i’m not sure. your kind of genuine feedback is what makes people write better. that’s important and hard to find.
That’s very generous of you, Rich. However, never forget that it’s all a bit like raising children – everyone has an opinion on what you should be doing. The trick is to listen to everyone, think about it, then make your own decision. Your stories are YOUR children. Other people’s opinions can be helpful but you’re the father. You’re in charge. The only exception would be if you’re dealing with an editor who might be going to publish your first book. Then, you DO ANYTHING that (s)he says. You can start resisting when you get to publishing the second one. Because the first one will have been a success – no doubt about that.
those are great words of encouragement. thanks. i’ve had suggestions with which i thanked the person. and i’ve had suggestions that i felt made the story better, and i made a change as soon as possible. i value them all. but i don’t agree with them all.
Dark take on rainbows, love it.
thanks a bunch.
Oh Man Rich you are such a brilliant writer…i love the way you weave horror… i loved that ending
the beauty of flash fictions
and only two months ago i was putting it down as a waste of time.
This moved from being an idyllic tale of finding the end of the rainbow into something much more gruesome. I think the reference to the vultures/ants brought the tale into another dimension which worked at the ‘horrifying’ level but maybe took something away from it at the ‘supernatural’ level. Just my thoughts. Either way, a good one that will stick in my mind. Well done!
Mine: http://castelsarrasin.wordpress.com/2012/05/17/pursuit-friday-fictioneers-may-2012/
thanks. i might have been better to leave out the ants and vultures. oh well. happy friday.
Dark and slightly confusing, which is all well and good. I like a head scratcher, and as long as rainbows aren’t shooting our of any one horned equines, it’s all good.
Here’s mine:http://teschoenborn.com/2012/05/17/friday-fictioneers-luck-of-the/
no unicorns here, unless they’re jousting, maybe.
You’d almost think the rainbow was deliberately placed to lead the way
I loved the ants, scream and vultures blinking … not at all what I expected from the photo prompt at all – brilliant 
Here be mine: http://womanontheedgeofreality.com/2012/05/18/friday-fictioneers-god-plays-the-tom-toms/
brilliant is a strong word, but i’ll take it.
Oh good
Vultures blinked. What a great ending from a ‘normal’ beginning. I also loved the last, lonely heartbeat, too.
thanks miss..
That last line was a clincher and gave me a shiver. Great set-up and great delivery.
Here’s mine: http://unspywriter.wordpress.com/friday-fictioneers/sure-and-its-hard-work-being-wee-folk/
not easy to get shivers. thanks.
Wow. Great job. Your writing never disappoints.
My attempt: http://authorbrandonscott.wordpress.com/2012/05/18/facade/
that’s a big compliment. and now for me to read others…thanks.
I actually liked the choppy sentences at the end. It adds an exclamation point to the horror of what they are seeing. And I absolutely adore the last line. Very graphic, very well done. And from such a beautiful and peaceful picture! http://theforgottenwife.com/2012/05/17/friday-fictioneers-2/
thanks miss. and i’m sure i’ll have equally nice things to say about yours.
The short sentence length adds to the threat and menace nicely. Well done sir.
thanks very much.
Happy Friday! I nominated you for the Sunshine Award. Come check it out: http://blessedwithastarontheforehead.wordpress.com/
me? sunshine? you sure? okay then.
You never thought you could be Sunshine for someone, did you? lol Your comments on my blog have been sunshine to me!!
i like the sound of that. me, bringing sunshine. wheee!!
A rather gruesome take on the prompt, Rich. And your words didn’t flow today, though sparse sentences are your trademark. Mine is here: http://readinpleasure.wordpress.com/2012/05/18/friday-fictioneers-sinking-low/
interesting that some people like the choppiness. some didn’t. i used it more to cut down to 100 words and pack as much in as possible. but sometimes “less is more.”
Idd, less is more! I really like how you make pictures in my head, AND emotions, even with only a few words. Brilliant!
that’s a very nice thing to say. thanks a bunch.
I very much enjoyed, Rich. Limiting yourself to 100 words does indeed force you to condense, and I for one find this way of writing compelling when done well, which you achieved.
http://thebradleychronicles.wordpress.com/2012/05/18/flash-fiction-friday-4/
thanks a bunch. lots for me to read tonight.
Stand by Me (movie) feeling! Grim but exciting.
love that movie.
I thought I’d commented on this one already but I don’t see it… Anyway, loved the story, gruesome though it is. It amazes me how anyone thinks of anything other than happy when looking at rainbows. I know I was happy when I saw it in real life, but my own story had a touch of sinister to it, too, lol.
thanks. you did comment, i saw it somewhere. i know i did, but i don’t know where. i’m reading through them all now, making my way up the list. i don’t “see” sinister, but i search for it.
Your story is like shorthand for a Grimm Fairytale! I love the sparsity of it. I know you said you were paring down to get to 100 words but you should claim this as your own genre of writing.
that’s a mighty big compliment. thanks a bunch.
really good as usual man. sadly, i didn’t do it again. i need to start planning for it on wednesday, because i don’t have times on fridays and the weekend. i try not to write on the weekends so that i can spend all that time with the family.
That’s a good reason to miss it. This took me a few days.
Crikey, Rich, that’s note a pretty picture! You convey it stylishly though – the writing is almost poetic especially towards the end.
I got a little confused by “it landed near flattened grass and footsteps, blades curled, blackened.” I felt like you would be describing the stick as having suffered in the raibow, but blades curled seems to refer to the grass, so I wasn’t sure whehter it was the grass or the stick that was blackened. Maybe a tweak there would help?
Overall, though, I thought you captured the boys perfectly (“best of three.” Brilliant), and the image was all too clear at the end!
If your readers are interested, I’m over here: http://elmowrites.wordpress.com/2012/05/18/friday-fiction-the-lie-of-the-land/
the stick was affected by the rainbow, but it was a delayed effect. david poked the rainbow, nothing happened, so he tossed the stick away. the grass near the stick, and the stick, blackened. the footsteps were to indicate that someone else had been there – which is the boy who just died because he touched the rainbow and it killed him.
oh good, i got it….i write a cracking comment don’t i? have you seen bill cosby’s routine about rainbows frying kids?
no, but i’ll look for it.
Wonderfully dark and gruesome. Great job.
Here’s mine
http://tollykitsjourney.wordpress.com/2012/05/18/rainbows-fridayfictioneers-flashfiction/
thanks. i read yours last night through the comments on madison woods’ site.
i did not expect that at all. good stuff!
thanks.
This was a very unique and unespected view of what might actually be at the end of a rainbow. Overpowering high energy, burning up all who dare trespass, loved it. I like the rock paper scizzors to choose which one. I know you had to cut words to get here, but I think you did well considering – this would be a good one to expand and give it the word count it deserves.
thanks for the very kind words.
I read this right before I headed out for a camping trip and I spent the weekend hoping we wouldn’t see any rainbows! You’ve a way of sneaking the sinister into the mundane so by the time you realize it’s happened, it’s already too late. OooOOOoooo!
Kathy
http://notforallmarkets.wordpress.com/2012/05/18/after/
Thank you very much for those kind words.
Saw that coming after he threw the stick away, you always seem to kill a character off too.
it happens.
Whoa …. Nice pic of rainbow leads to dark ending.
you never know what’ll happen if you actually find the end of it.
Great job, Rich. I’m sure writing dark stories to pretty pictures is as difficult as writing humor to disaster photos. I liked the short, choppy sentences. It creates a very vivid image in the mind.
Thanks for those kind words. It’s a comparison I’ve never considered. Have a great day.
Bravo!!!!
Gracias.