#fridayfictioneers via rochelle – 1/25

Every Wednesday Roughskin Wisoff-Fields posts a picture prompt to challenge writers to create a 100-word story or poem or anything that works for you.  After you post your work on your blog,  go back to her site and add a link to your post on her Friday Fictioneers post.  Place.  Page.

I’m going to try to keep up with this, as should you.  Give it a shot.  I prefer to stick to 100 words, but she doesn’t mind either way.  Not everyone has the time to sit and write, revise, edit, revise, edit, etc. until getting it down to 100 and telling everything you want to tell.

________________________

 ff

Lunchtime in Florida

“Lookit the chest on the blue one!”

“Red bikini got perfect legs.”

“Legs?”

“Yeah.”

“Legs are okay, but I love a big rack.  Watch ‘em bounce when she runs to the water.  Nature’s built-in buoys.”

“You got issues.  Think about where those legs go.  That soft, round, fleshy-”

“You’re into butts?  I thought you meant something else.”

“Wanna get that soft spot.  Can’t wait to taste me some juicy-”

“Shhh.  Calm down.  She’s coming.”

Me calm down?”

“Dude, you’re scaring them.  You come on too strong.”

“Relax.  It’s SpringBreak.  They’re everywhere.  And I’m hungry.”

Two sharks lurked beyond the breakers…

________________________

100 words

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149 Responses to #fridayfictioneers via rochelle – 1/25

  1. Sandra says:

    This is really funny! I thought it was really naughty at first, but it’s hilarious.

  2. Hi Rich,
    I have a strong feeling sharks are not the only lurkers, lookers, lusters, and that this is written from long personal experience. Ron

  3. I did not see that one coming and boy did it shift the emotion. Good job!! Now to get my attention off the movie “Jaws” lol.

  4. MissFourEyes says:

    Whoa, haha! I was waiting for the end, I knew you wouldn’t write about a bunch of kids

  5. Sandra says:

    We took similar inspiration this week, but you went for ‘comic’. At the beginning I though you’d gone for a slant that I was playing around with yesterday afternoon. Mine started in a similar fashion with two guys watching the girls and saying “When God was giving out bosoms, she must have misheard him and got in the line for zits”…. . But I couldn’t get it any further than that. :( Nice one Rich, made me grin. Thank you.

  6. Jan Brown says:

    I knew there had to be a twist, but even knowing that, I was surprised at the ending!!! Very well done, Rich.

  7. Rich, I think everybody will agree this is hilarious. Playful, anthropomorphic, and a little racy. That it’s 100 words and so good, it’s hard to believe.

  8. Excellent, my friend. Did my boobs post provide any inspiration? I thought frat boys in the beginning and then reread to see the sharks! You had me.

  9. Tom Poet says:

    Rich,
    You can take the man out of Jersey but not the Jersey Shore out of the man…Funny story.
    Tom

  10. So was not expecting that… had a great laugh. Well done.

  11. aFrankAngle says:

    Ha ha … at first I thought it was a conversation between us at the beach.

  12. That whole piece was so you, Rich. As for glasses (in the comment section), as Bill told our older daughter when she was wearing glasses, “Men make passes at girls who wear glasses.” True or not, it made her feel better.

    janet

  13. JackieP says:

    Well about the glasses in the comment section. Oh yeah men make passes at girls in glasses. We are a sexy bunch we are. :-)
    Now for the story, I really enjoyed it. I wasn’t sure at first if it was just boys talking. Then I read the last and laughed. Now that was good.

  14. boomiebol says:

    Hahaha… I love it. Truth be told many (young) men are mighty sharks…

    This is brilliant

  15. Hayley says:

    Hahaha, love the twist!! Crazy sharks…. spring break must be an all-you-can-eat buffet for them. Great story :)

  16. jenniesisler says:

    This is hilarious! Who knew sharks were as pervy as drunken frat boys on spring break? So Bruce was a perv and not a maniacal killer…great job!

  17. I laughed out loud despite the fact I had been warned there would be a shark connection. Thumbs up.

  18. I guess sharks don’t like human male meat? I donno, some of them seem awfully plump.

  19. muZer says:

    Hehe.. Now that was totally unexpected.. Sharks talk and how! :-) Very unique and creative.

  20. elappleby says:

    Outrageous! I loved the twist at the end – I’m guessing you really enjoyed writing this one :)

  21. Comic porn. I get it. At first I thought it was college porn ( you know like corn porn) and then when I learned it was the sharks talking I was a little embarrassed I thought it was porn. But THEN I read the exchange between you and MissFourEyes and am back to corn porn. ;)
    Fun post!

  22. Very funny. I was imaging my son & his friends at the shore this Summer…yes, they have been known to be sharklike at times.

  23. tedstrutz says:

    Love it, Rich! Sharks!!! All I could think of as I read this was, Rochelle’s going to have a fit, because there was no Genre tag to warn sensitive eyes.

  24. nightlake says:

    unexpected ending indeed..

  25. Joyce says:

    Ha Ha. I am a fan of the Jaws movies and books by Peter Benchley, isn’t it? We have some of the original books. Those sounded like a couple of hungry great whites. Have you ever seen, “The Deep”? That was very good too.

    • rich says:

      i saw the deep, but i barely remember it other than jacqueline bisset in a wet t-shirt.

      • Joyce says:

        yes, I’m sure. She did draw the attention with that scene. :) I forgot the name of the other leading character, who also played in, “Rich Man, Poor Man”, the blond, Nordic guy. Anyway, it was a suspenseful movie. When we first saw the first Jaws movie, husband and I and our oldest girl were down in Miami, Fla. on vacation visiting his parents and we went to see it then (without her, of course since she would never have gone into the water after that, and she learned how to swim too, on the gulf side of Florida while we visited there too). Anyway, it seemed all the more real watching it in Miami as we went to the beaches every day almost when down there.

      • rich says:

        if you’re ever in florida again near the ocean, try to get up high in a hotel and look down at the water. you’ll be surprised how many sharks you might see.

      • Joyce says:

        I have no doubt about that. My brother once went deep-sea fishing on an overnight fishing cruise boat and was so disappointed that he could not catch any big fish that swam in those waters. Maybe they were all eaten up by the sharks in those waters. :) He was able to get a nice large halibut though once up in the northwest coastal waters of Alaska near Juneau, and had it cut and processed so we could all enjoy some of it. It sure was good. I love fish, all kinds and all types (so far). Squid is not bad, but have not yet tasted Sushi. My daughter has and really liked it.

  26. kz says:

    hahaha i almost wanted to slap the two men… then found out they’re sharks.lol great twist, absolutely funny ^^

  27. Well, that was quite a twist. I’m picturing the sharks from Finding Nemo… except that they were vegetarians.

  28. claireful says:

    Hah! I loved the twist. A good one Rich.

  29. Beautiful comic from a shark’s perspective. Nice one!
    BTW, your installments or series are a good read. Read most of them on my phone and mostly got issues with comment from that medium. :)

  30. Dear Glitch,
    Still laughing at your sharks. funny. Thanks for commenting on mine.
    Shalom,
    Roughskin

  31. unspywriter says:

    Lots of great double-entendre here, and a good chuckle as well. Boys will be boys regardless of species. ;)

    Here’s mine: http://unexpectedpaths.com/friday-fictioneers/and-when-we-go-back-to-the-sea/

  32. tonyoleson says:

    Man, I loved the stop/start hush hush that was going on… I was thinking “geez that’s what I’d say!” but… I guess I’m not a shark then, am I? Rock on, I liked this… Funny as hell.

  33. rheath40 says:

    Why does this little story of yours not surprise me. ;-) Very funny take on my photo. Very funny indeed.

  34. annisik51 says:

    I laughed. Great characterisation of two stud.. sorry, living, breathing stereotypes. They’re everywhere, you know! Ann

  35. Love, Love, Love the shark twist.

  36. Great misdirection; very clever, Rich! Big smile here.

  37. Sheila says:

    Hahah – that’s a great one! I love the shark twist. I started wondering what was going on when he said wanna get that soft spot, but then it all makes sense whether they’re hungry sharks or hungry boys during spring break. Thanks for the laugh!

  38. billgncs says:

    I started laughing at roughskin, and laughed the whole way through.

    • rich says:

      i tried to find a breed of shark that started with an R, and all i could find was roughskin, which is more of a nickname for a certain breed. thanks for reading.

  39. sandraconner says:

    ‘Surprise Ending’ taken to the highest (or lowest) level!!! Whichever direction you want to see it, you did a great job of getting there. And you’re right about sharks and frats being synonymous.

  40. Brilliant! Loved the twist with it turning out to be the sharks and not a couple of frat boys. You’re really too clever for your own good, Mr Rich.

  41. yerpirate says:

    Rather a good chuckle on that one..’The’ two sharks..
    Is funny every reading!

  42. Hilarious! Love the dialogue

  43. either I’m that naive or you’re that good. I never saw it coming, but had the best laugh.

  44. deanabo says:

    Ha ha ha … This really has me laughing!

  45. Too cute. No clue what that was about until the end.

  46. keliwright says:

    I must have a clean mind. Totally knew they were sharks. ;)

  47. Sharks could be hungry lots of different ways and these two could be fish or foul. Great parallel!

  48. vbholmes says:

    So…did the sharks get religion or did the nubile lovelies literally come for dinner? My sympathies are with the girls–that’s an awfully messy way to go. As for reading the comments and replies–wouldn’t miss them–they’re at least as interesting as the posts, and sometimes more so.

  49. Erinleary says:

    So many bad puns and comebacks in mind, but the twist from mysoginist to shark was effective. Now that you mention it, they are somewhat similar, biologically….

  50. elmowrites says:

    Nice bait and switch, Rich. I wish the reveal could have been move subtle, but with 100 words and so much for these guys to say, I can definitely see why you did it this way

  51. Okay, Rich, you got me good!
    Scott

  52. Sunshine says:

    i say, fun times. :p

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